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She smiled, unperturbed. She understood. Her 'bonus' would be added to her pay cheque and she'd receive a text when she was next 'required'. They'd fuck her again. All of them... Okay, so she's happy. She's fulfilled her fantasies but her story's no fairy tale. I don't want to be the redhead anymore. Or the blonde with the enormous breasts. I prefer my story, my ending. I close my eyes relishing the heat of my partner's body and basking in the warmth of his love."Thank you," I murmur."What for?" Oh, you know." Providing inspiration?" He kisses my back, then suddenly rolls away from me."Where are you going?" I ask, turning sharply. "Don't go." I'm not." He smiles, his blue eyes shining. "I'm not going anywhere. Here." He holds out my notepad, the tattered cover bent backward. "And this." He hands me my pen. "Did I help? Have I inspired you?"Smiling, I nod. "Definitely."“Do you need to be alone now? To write, I mean.”I shake my head and pat the bed beside me. Accepting the invitation,. " For a time he went on the streets and sold himself, he felt soworthless. He couldn't concentrate, or hold a job. He tried to killhimself, twice, he said, but he failed even there. Worst of all, hecouldn't confide in anyone, or trust anyone. He had this terrible fearof betrayal, after what his fiancee had done to him. When I tried totouch him reassuringly after I got his phone number and gave him mine,he trembled so hard he couldn't get his coat on." I was still hopeful about my marriage. In fact it was going to lastanother seventeen years, though I didn't know it, and I didn't know itwas going to cost me a large part of me, my enthusiasm, my trust inother people, any instincts for kindness I might have had. I wasalready getting arrogant, getting to be the kind of woman who feelsfree to talk bitchy to any shoe clerk who's only trying to do what he'sasked to do. I got worse, as the years went by. You know that now I'ma tough broad, hard to live with, sarcastic, suspicious of.
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